in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Actions speak louder than pants.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Randomize
