3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
