Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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