Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
