we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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