the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Randomize