He asked to "fluff my boner.."
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
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