i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Randomize
