I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
