do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
