Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Randomize
