Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
