Why does Corona taste like a burp?
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
Randomize
