We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
