Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Do you still have your period?
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
