If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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