everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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