She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
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