I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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