Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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