hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize
