is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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