dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
you had me at cake vodka
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
