i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
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