I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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