It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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