her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
sex in a hospital.. check
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize
