Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
