They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
What drink are we having for lunch?
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize