Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize