i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Randomize
