Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
