Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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