Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
