i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
