The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
