Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
