I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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