ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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