What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
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