You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
