I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
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