I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
