Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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