I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
