Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
