If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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