Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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