Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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