Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
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