Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
