You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
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